BLACK SWAN

WTF?

Ballerina Nina (Natalie Portman) scores the lead role her company’s production of Swan Lake; but only after impressing her sleazy dance teacher Thomas (an underused Vincent Cassel) and following the ousting of aging prima ballerina Beth (Winona Ryder). But what starts out as a dream come true soon becomes a nightmare as Nina must contend with rival ballerina Lily (Mila Kunis) getting all single white female on her; or not. Is Nina really in danger or is it all in her head?

Natalie Portman does deserve all the kudos and awards she has been getting for her portal of Nina, she lends a manic unhinged air to her performance while at the same time managing to make Nina scared and vulnerable – of both herself and those around her. Her transformation as it were is brilliantly played, her drive and passion oozes from the screen. She is matched by Kunis as Lily who revels in the ambiguous stalker-ness of the role. Portman and Kunis also share a very hot onscreen chemistry with their love scene rating high on the raunchy scale. Both are supported by a fantastic Barbara Hershey as Nina’s over protective Mommie Dearest mother, and with what little she is given, Ryder’s Beth is creepily effective – even if I had to turn away during her final scene.

Indeed I found myself looking away a lot during Black Swan. There are some very unsettling images and moments – Nina picking at her fingernails is almost too much to bear! Director Darren Aronofsky is know for his trippy visual films, including Pi and Requiem for a Dream, and Black Swan is certainly one trippy film. It is a mind f**k; a brilliantly filmed mind f**k. Aronofsky employs shaky cam which gives proceedings an unbalanced edge as Nina finds herself increasingly more tormented from forces outside and within.

Also notable is Aronofsky use of mirrors to effectively highlight the film’s theme of dual identities and dark reflections. Nina’s role in Swan Lake means she must play the good white swan and the bad black swan. Black Swan is all about identity as good swan Nina struggles to keep black swan Lily at bay while also seeking to subdue her own ‘black swan’ buried deep within her psyche. Confusing? Well Black Swan can be very confusing, and even with its breathtaking climax, that does provide answers, I was still left me scratching my head thinking WTF?

But then that is half the fun of movies like Black Swan, they leave you theorising and speculating long after the credits have rolled; and likes last year’s Inception its great to have a movie that keeps your mind active. Black Swan is certainly a trip, and one well worth taking…

3 ½ of 5 Stars

THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT

Yes this was released in 2010, but I only saw it recently and given its win at the Golden Globes, and Oscar nominations, I thought it was pertinent to comment on it; plus it’s my website and I’ll blog what I want…

The Kids Are All Right centres on lesbian couple Nic and Jules (Annette Bening & Julianne Moore respectively) who have managed to raise two kids and who, despite having 2 mums, turned out all right (Surprise!). All is going swimmingly until the kids decide they want to meet their sperm donor dad, easy going Paul (Mark Ruffalo), without telling their mums. Inevitably the truth comes out and soon the whole ‘family’ are dining together. But things get complicated as Jules finds herself drawn to Paul putting her relationship and the happiness of her family in jeopardy. Will everything turn out…wait for it…alright?

The Kid Are All Right feels like an episode of an above average TV drama on the big screen, with the added bonus of an A-list cast. And aside from the cast I don’t know why this film is getting all the critical praise it has been getting as the story of extra marital affairs is hardly new, and I wouldn’t be surprised of the novelty of having Moore and Bening play lesbians isn’t the real reason for the praise; OMG its so daring!

That said their relationship feels very real and believable, which makes the fallout of Jules’ betrayal wrenching. Bening is great in the dinner scene (you know the one) and Moore plays Jules confliction over her attraction to Paul well. Mark Ruffalo is great as sperm donor Paul, walking a fine line between nice guy and slightly untrustworthy lout. And Aussie actress Mia Wasikowska and Josh Hutcherson as the kids are great even if they are given very little to do.

According to the Golden Globes Kids is a comedy, and while it is amusing, given the subject matter I don’t know why it wasn’t classified as a drama (probably because it wouldn’t have a chance against The Social Network). Its win is almost as confusing as Benings win for best actress (and her Oscar nod), yes she is good, but Julianne Moore is clearly the standout as the very torn Jules. But then I guess the Golden Globe nominations hardly ever make sense, why should the actual winners be any different? Not that the Oscars ignoring Moore again are much better…

All in all The Kids Are All Right is a solid, entertaining but ultimately forgettable. Honestly? A resounding Meh.

2 ½ of 5 Stars

LOVE & OTHER DRUGS

Jamie Randall (Jake Gyllenhaal) is a serial ladies man bedding girl after girl without the worry of feelings or love. That is until he meets Maggie Murdock (Anne Hathaway) a free spirit, with a hidden secret (She has early onset Parkinsons!), who is also looking for no strings attached sex. But of course this being a romantic comedy Jamie soon catches feelings, which forces both of them to confront the realities of Maggie’s illness. Oh the whole thing is set in the early years of Viagra too – not that that has much bearing on the whole thing.

Romantic comedies are all about the onscreen chemistry of the couple, and luckily Gyllenhaal and Hathaway share great on-screen chemistry and their sex scenes often border on the raunchy side. Indeed their nakedness is really the drawcard for the whole movie – hey look its Anne Hathaway’s boobs!

As fragile Maggie Hathaway is tremendous, subtly playing the signs of Maggie’s Parkinsons without going overboard (she doesn’t go full retard as Kirk Lazarus would say). Director Edward Zwick does use the parkinson subplot for emotional weight, and tears, managing to mine both by featuring real life sufferers discussing their conditions. However while the reality of carefree Jamie possibly having to one day become Maggie’s full time carer is touched on it is dismissed quickly so as not to spoil the happy ending (oh come on it’s a romantic comedy for gosh sakes…).

Gyllenhaal’s Jamie is very lovable despite his womanising ways, and a lot of the films comedy comes from his time spent selling Viagra, with co-worker Bruce (Oliver Platt), to doctors via their ‘responsive’ female reception staff. Josh Gad as Jamie’s brother Josh also provides some big laughs – his use of video material is one of the films best moments.

In the end I actually wanted to like Love & Other Drugs a lot more than I did, and I expected it to be a lot funnier than it was. It’s nice to see a romantic comedy with substance, but frankly it could have been better –naked A list starts having fake (but sexy) sex onscreen does not a movie make.

3 of 5 Stars

MORNING GLORY

Fired from her job as a producer on local morning breakfast show Becky Fuller (Rachel McAdams), through her sheer pluck and determination, manages to score a better gig on the low rating, and nearing cancellation, Daybreak hosted by Colleen Peck (Dianne Keaton channelling KAK) and Paul McVee (Modern Family’s Ty Burrell). Becky finds herself in hot water when on the first day of the job she fires the sleazy Paul, leaving her a co-host short. Desperate to save her show, and her job, Becky blackmails out to pasture journalist Mike Pomeroy (Harrison Ford) into becoming the new co-anchor, but can they survive working together and will it be enough to save the show? Oh and there is also a plotline about workaholic Becky finding love – but I’m going to give that as much attention as director Roger Michell did – that is not much.

As plucky producer Becky McAdams owns this movie, and she is given able support from Harrison Ford as the curmudgeonly set in his ways Pomeroy. It is their relationship that forms the main plot of Moring Glory as Becky tries to get Pomeroy to embrace infotainment style news of breakfast TV over the hard hitting journalism of yore. This isn’t the romantic comedy the trailers would have you believe, indeed Patrick Wilson as love interest Adam, doesn’t get to contribute much, and their union is devoid of any dramatic tension.

Diane Keaton is wasted in her role as the Colleen and while she does score some big laughs once she is allowed to get nutty on air, she is still far too underused. On the other hand Matt Malloy as resident weatherman Ernie Appleby manages to get the biggest laughs of the film with the smallest role, his reaction to a roller coaster ride is worth the price of admission alone.

McAdams might be able to juggle love and a job but I’m not sure screen writer Aline McKenna can convincingly juggle the comedy and drama elements in Morning Glory. Is it cutting satire, goofy comedy, or a romantic comedy with streaks of serious drama? In the end it’s a little bit of all of them, which doesn’t add up to a satisfying whole. The brightest parts of Morning Glory are the behind the scenes shenanigan’s of morning television and I can’t help but think if the movie had focused more on that it would have been stronger for it.

3 ½ of 5 Stars

TANGLED

Everybody knows the story of Rapunzel don’t they? A princess with really really really long hair trapped in a tower until a handsome prince comes along and rescues her… Well, Tangled is Disney’s version of the fairytale, with a title that is a little more male friendly and a trailer that emphasises its swashbuckling male lead over the princess and hides the musical numbers.

Many years ago the vain crone Gothel (Donna Murphy) discovered a magical flower that restores youth which she hides and greedily keeps to herself. When the kingdom’s pregnant queen falls ill the flower is discovered and used as a healing elixir. When Rapunzel (Mandy Moore) is born she possesses a long mane of golden hair that, like the flower, can stop the aging process, however if it is cut off its power fades. Not wanting to lose her loose her ‘follicle’ of youth, Gothel kidnaps Rapunzel and locks her away in a hidden tower.

Rapunzel is content to stay locked up in order to please her mother, but longs to discover the source of the ‘lights’ that appear in the sky every year on her birthday (A tribute by the king and queen for their missing princess). When rouge thief Flynn Ryder (Zachary Levi) drops in however Rapunzel seizes her chance and blackmails Flynn into taking her to see the lights. Mummy isn’t going to be happy.

Mandy Moore and Zachary Levi are great as the romantic duo, but it is Donna Murphy as Rapunzel’s evil ‘mother’ Gothel that really impresses. Gothel is the embodiment of passive aggressive mothering, using every trick to keep her darling Rapunzel locked in her tower – its very Mommie Dearest. Of course it wouldn’t be a Disney movie without funny animal sidekicks, and Tangled gives us cheeky Gecko Pascal and the scene stealing palace horse Maximus. Maximus is a study in silent acting, the driven horse will do anything to catch his man, in this case Flynn Ryder, and the pair’s unlikely team-up provides many of the films biggest laughs.

Tangled looks absolutely gorgeous, an old style animated film taken into the 3rd dimension. The backgrounds are lush and inviting, the lantern scene is breath taking and the character animation, particularly that of bloodhound horse Maximus, is sensational – especially given horses are one of the hardest creatures to animate.

Tangled is Disney’s second attempt, after last years The Princess & The Frog, to reinstate the tradition of animated musicals which fell out of vouge following their boom in the 90’s. Unfortunately none of the composer Alan Menken’s songs come close to matching his older work with Howard Ashman (The Little Mermaid, Aladdin and Beauty & the Beast) but they are toe tapping enough that I wouldn’t be surprised if Tangled turns up as a Broadway show (if only for the tavern scene!)…

Overall Tangled is a return to form for Disney whose earnest, heart on its sleeve storytelling has suffered next to snappy and sarcastic hits like Shrek, and even the broad appeal of sister studio Pixar. Tangled is a fairytale for modern audiences, full of action, laughs and just enough sentiment without it becoming cloying. Tangled has the distinction of being Disney’s 50th animated feature, and if they are all as good as this I look forward to the next 50…

4 of 5 Stars

WELCOME TO 2011

And we are back!

A month into the New Year already – can you believe it?

A new year brings new movies and hopefully more regular updates from me, starting with some brand new reviews…

Let’s see if I can keep things a little more timely this year…

2010 - A MIXED BAG (OF POPCORN)

And so 2010 comes to an end, not the best year for movies, and clearly these last few months have not had me champing at the bit to get to a cinema…lets take stock shall we?

Everyone else is doing it…

2010 didn’t have any outright stinkers like last years Where The Wild Things Are (I. HATE. THIS. FILM) or Astroboy (So many childhood dreams shattered), though it did have some disappointments’; Sex & The City 2 and Scott Pilgrim VS The World I’m looking at you…the less said about Clash of the Titans the better…

On the plus side 2010 saw a resurgence of Australian films, or certainly Australian films I would pay money to see in cinemas. From the bright and colourful (and flawed) Bran Nue Dae, Peter Helliar’s uneven attempt at the Rom-Com with I Love You Too, and finally the all ages action adventure of Tomorrow When The War Began. Stay out of the dreary suburbs Aussie film makers and I’ll continue to support you!

There was no big break out comedy hit like last year’s The Hangover, with Date Movie and Hot Tub Time Machine being funny but somewhat lacking. Likewise action films were in short supply, though Salt put up a valiant effort, The A-Team entertained while The Expendables wasted its action movie all star cast.

3D continued its assault on the big screen, even if the 3D only added to the ticket price and not the experience. When you are witness to a piranha fight over a CGI penis (Piranha 3D) you know 3D has reached its limits…

It was a year of farewells as Shrek and Toy Story took their final bows – and Harry Potter began its extended swan song. The super hero movie took a year off, only Iron Man 2 and Kick Ass daring to leap from tall buildings – although 2011 looks set to be the year of the super hero with Thor, Captain America and Green Lantern all fighting for dominance.

Instead the thinking person’s film returned with the mind bending logic, and special effects of Inception, and the talky, but riveting The Social Network putting intelligently written and engrossing scripts back onto the big screen. More please!

But the best film of 2010?

For me it isn’t a tough call at all, while I enjoyed The Social Network and Inception, no film left me completely satisfied like Toy Story 3. As far as I am concerned it’s a masterpiece from beginning to end; it has it all – action, adventure, laughs, and moments that can turn a grown man into a blubbering mess. And when you pay your cash and sit in that big dark room of strangers that’s what you want from a movie?

Isn’t it?

Happy New Year…see you at the movies in 2011!

HARRY POTTER & THE DEATHLY HALLOWS PT 1

For reasons that really amount to laziness, I have not completed a full Harry Potter review...I may post soon...

Needless to say this isn't the best Harry Potter film and it suffers, I think, from being split into 2 parts to satisfy the marketing machine of Warner Bros.

In fact this outing is most like the final book on which it is based, long, meandering and it spends way too much time camping. Honestly, get on with it! That sait the final moments are a thrill, even if they do leave you dissapointed that there will be a 6 month wait for The End.

10 years and 8 films is quite an acheivement, but for this outing I can't give full marks...yet...I'll reasses next year...

3 1/2 Stars

JACKASS 3D

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to a 3D movie after Piranha 3D along comes Jackass 3D; redefining what 3D technology means for filmmaking - namely capturing every body fluid imaginable in the glorious three dimensional slow motion.

Jackass began life as a TV show on MTV; Host Johnny Knoxville got together with fellow maniacs including Bam Magera and Steve-O to perform dangerous, outrageous, and at times offensive, stunts with total disregard for their own safety. Not content with small screen stardom the boys jumped to the big screen in 2002. 8 years later and the usual array of daredevil d***kheads have reunited to once again put their bodies through all manner of pain and indignity – with hilarious results.

The Jackass films are not high art and are not for anyone that is easily offended; but that said f**k they are funny. I would find it odd if you weren’t entertained, at the most base human level, by the assortment of bike stacks, bull rams, head punches and the always popular groin punch. The dwarf bar brawl featuring Wee Man aka Jason Acuna is easily a standout as is the man vs. jet engine sequence.

Jackass 3D does walk a fine line of good taste…sweat cocktail is disgusting and of all the animal stunts (and there are many – with all of the ‘jackasses’ coming off second best) seeing a pig eat an apple out of the behind of a large man is not something anyone should be subjected to; I still laughed though - does that make me a bad person?

I contemplated giving Jackass 3D a 4 star rating; it is what it is, and it does exactly what you would expect it to BUT the concept is feeling a little long in the tooth. Some of the stunts are spectacular – the Poo Cocktail Supreme being the piece de resistance – but others feel very scraped together, as though the guys were desperate for ideas in order to stretch out proceedings. The 3D element adds depth of field, and is at its best in slow motion replays, but isn’t really needed – vomit is still disgusting no matter what the dimension. Jackass 3D is a great way to kill time, and will have you rolling in the aisles in-between bouts of dry retching – what more could you ask for?

3 ½ of 5 Stars

THE SOCIAL NETWORK

The Social Network, adapted from the best selling book ‘The Accidental Billionaires’, charts not only the rise of the Facebook phenomenon but also its founder Mark Zuckerberg. Like all good stories it is a tale or romance, rejection, friendship and betrayal.

Rejected by his girlfriend a drunken Mark Zuckerberg (Jesse Eisenberg) creates a website that rates girls from his university, the site proves popular, overwhelming the university server until it is taken down and Mark is disciplined. Soon after Mark is approached by the Winklevoss twins, wanting him to write code for their new website idea, a social network built exclusively for Harvard university students. Mark agrees to help, until he has his own ideas about a similar website, which he begins working on with the help of his best friend and business partner Eduardo Saverin (future Spider-man Andrew Garfield). And thus Facebook is born.

The Social Network centres around the lawsuits brought against Zuckerberg by the Winklevoss’ for allegedly stealing their idea, and by Saverin who Zuckerberg, with the help of Napster founder Sean Parker (Justin Timberlake) is shut out from Facebook just as it becomes a success. Jumping between the parallel lawsuits and the early days of Facebook’s creation The Social Network explores the questions and ethics around who ‘owns’ an idea. Did Zuckerberg steal the idea for Facebook from the brothers Winklewoss? If he creates the code doesn’t that mean he owns it? Does he resent his best friend’s campus popularity? And most importantly, is Zuckerberg this much of a socially inept jerk in real life? Whatever the answer screenwriter Aaron Sorkin has crafted an engrossing story filled populated by fascinating characters whose motivations are never clear cut.

However a great script is nothing without a great cast and thankfully they all bring their A-game. Eisenberg is fascinating as Zuckerberg, a role that calls for him to be repellent and sympathetic while Garfield brings pathos to his performance as Zuckerberg’s former best friend Saverin. Timberlake is in his element as shifty Napster founder Sean Parker and Arnie Hammer does a stellar job as the screwed over (depending on your view) Winklevoss twins– hard to believe he’s not really a twin!

Also of note is the stylish direction by David Fincher (Seven, Zodiac, Panic Room) – the crew sequence is particularly arresting – and Nine Inch Nails front man Trent Reznor’s subtle but intriguing score. Fact or fiction, when all is said and done The Social Network is a sure fire Oscar contender and one of the most engrossing movies of the year. Like!

4 of 5 Stars

EASY A

Easy A is the next in a never ending procession of high school teen comedies; except this one is actually good; and we haven’t had a good one in such a long time!

After lying to a friend about losing her virginity Olive Pendergast (Emma Stone) soon becomes the talk of her school. When gay friend Brandon (Dan Byrd) convinces Olive to pretend to sleep with him, so he can stop being bullied, it only further cements her ‘reputation’. Inspired by ‘The Scarlet Letter’ which she is reading for class Olive starts playing up her provocative image and soon all manner of social rejects are crawling out of the woodwork offering Olive gift certificates in lieu of spending some ‘quality time’ with her.

Enterprising Olive is happy to coast along until the lies start to take a personal toll, the only trouble is, how does she stop the school gossip grapevine? Can she win back her friends, and win over clean cut love interest Woodchuck Todd (Penn Badgley) in the process?

Stone owns Easy A; as a romantic comedy lead she leaves Katherine Heigel in the dust with her engaging screen presence and wonderful comic timing. Thankfully she is also supported by a strong biting script and fantastic array of supporting actors including Stanley Tucci and Patricia Clarkson as her over sharing amorous parents. Easy A skewers the modern day high school experience, mining it for laughs, that just like its lead, aren’t easy.

3 ½ of 5 Stars

THE OTHER GUYS

Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg play miss-matched desk jockey Detectives Allen Gamble and Terry Hoitz, constantly in the shadow of precinct heroes Detective Danson and Highsmith (scene stealing cameos from The Rock and Samuel L Jackson). However when an act of stupidity leads to hilarious tragedy Hoitz sees it as his and Gamble’s chance to shine. Gamble on the other hand prefers his quiet life of paper work however said paperwork uncovers a case that could turn he and Hoitz into New York’s next big hero cop team – if they can survive each other first!

Look, I’ll be honest writing this review 2 months after I saw the movie has proven just how forgettable The Other Guys is, both in plot and performance. The plot which follows some sort of white collar ponzi scheme, run by Steve Coogan, is confusing and boring, and involves an unnecessary Anne Heche cameo – honestly why is she in this film? She contributes nothing…

Ferrell and Wahlberg play well off each other, and Hotiz shock that Danson appears so irresistible to women is one of the movies best running gags. The other highlight is the welcome of Michael Keaton who steals every scene is is in as the police chief who moonlights at a homewares store; and who provides words of advice unintentionally ripped form TLC song lyrics.

The Other Guys boasts an all star cast with an above average script and some over the top action; fun but forgettable.

3 of 5 Stars

I’M BACK!

It’s been a while. My ‘day job’ got hectic which didn’t leave a lot of time for movies. And to be honest there weren’t many that had me chomping at the bit to part with 20 bucks…

But now that we enter the final stretch of 2010 (already?) a slew of new movies are on the horizon including the beginning of the end for Harry Potter!

To catch up I’ll be posting quick reviews of EASY A and THE OTHER GUYS; both long gone from cinemas but still worth talking about. And then my thoughts on the much hyped and talked about The Social Network…

And then I hope to be back each week with a brand new review. So bring on the Christmas movie season – but please, don’t think that means I want ANOTHER Santa Clause…are you listening Tim Allen?

DESPICABLE ME

Gru (Steve Carell) is a super villain whose greatest claim to fame is stealing the Time Square Jumbo-Tron and the statue of Liberty or rather the Vegas replica. However Gru finds himself overshadowed by rival upstart Vector (Jason Segel) who manages to steal not only the great pyramids of Giza but the headlines. And so, desperate to beat Vector, and make his aloof mother proud (an under used Julie Andrews), Gru decides to steal the impossible…The Moon!

Trouble is Gru needs some money to complete his plan, and the Evil Bank (what bank isn’t?) won’t lend it to him until he obtains the shrink ray he needs to make the moon transportable; unfortunately Vector has that too. Enter the impossibly cute Margo, Edith and Agnes (Miranda Cosgrove, Dana Gaier and Elsie Fisher), 3 little girls searching for a family. Gru realises that the girls would be perfect for his plan and adopts them with the intention of ditching them once he has his shrink ray; but that is only if they don’t melt his icy villain heart first.

Despicable Me is bright cartoony fun, nothing more, nothing less. Gru might be a villain but being voiced by nice guy Carell makes us root for him and he is at his most loveable interacting with the young girls as a reluctant parent. Vector is an amusing foil and his rivalry with Gru has a lot in common with classic Looney Tunes Coyote and Roadrunner. Similarly Gru’s army of diminutive yellow minions provide great slapstick fun and laughs; but disappointingly the movie’s biggest laughs are in the trailer. In the ranks of animated films Despicable Me never reaches the height of Pixar, but it does offer an enjoyable time for the whole family.

3 of 5 Stars

STEP UP 3D

Oh My God! Step Up 3D is one of like, seriously, the most deep movies I’ve seen in, like, forever. NOT.

Aspiring film-maker Luke (Rick Malambri) runs a wayward home/dance club for aspiring dancers (‘Born from the boom box’) so that they can live their dreams (without paying rent it seems). However his dancing utopia is under threat of bank foreclosure, or to make matters worse, being bought out by dancing rival dance crew leader Julien (Joe Slaughter). Rick and crew’s only chance is to win dance competition ‘World Jam’. And if that plotline wasn’t exciting enough you can also thrown in Luke’s budding romance with sexy dancer Natalie (Home and Away’s Sharni Vinson) who just might be hiding a secret that could tear Luke’s dance crew apart forever! OMG!

Shallower than an episode of ‘So You Think You Can Dance’ Step Up 3D is awash with under dog cliques, poorly drawn (and in some cases annoying) characters and trite dialogue.

Tired plot aside Malambri and Vinson do share great onscreen chemistry (both are also very easy on the eye) and do well with the limited material they are given. They are miles ahead of Adam G. Sevani as the irritating Moose who managed to grate on me every time he opened his mouth, or destroyed public property in the name of dance. Seriously, this kid kicks over balloons, steals a guys hate, and throws garbage cans around the street – its meant to be charming but I just wanted to see some bigger badder dancer stomp all over him! I’d also like to single out dancing twins Martin and Facundo Lombard who have 2 of the most grating screen presences in cinema history; stick to dancing boys.

In the end the kinetic dancing sequences are the only reason to see Step Up 3D. I’m no expert in dance, well aside from my A+ mark for my Year 10 School Certificate, but the dance sequences are some of the most impressive I’ve seen; a true visual treat. The 3D effect adds a greater feeling of depth – even if arms popping and locking towards the camera was an overused gimmick. The final dance sequence with its light up uniforms is particularly well choreographed. Fun note: Watch as the villainous Julien’s jacket disappears and reappears at will during the final face-off.

It’s not going to win awards, and I don’t think it wants to, but Step Up 3D does offer an exciting visual treat with attractive stars, dodgy CGI slurpees and some of the best dance sequences to hit the big screen.

3 of 5 Stars

TOMORROW WHEN THE WAR BEGAN

High schooler Ellie Linton (Caitlin Stasey) and her friends escape the small country town of Wirrawee for a much needed break in the bush. However once they return home they find their parents are missing, and their town – and the rest of Australia - has been overrun by a mysterious invading military force. Their backs against the wall the teens resolve to fight back hoping to free their parents and their town.

Based on John Marsden’s beloved series of novels (compulsory reading for many high school students) Tomorrow When the War Began (TWTWB) is director Stuart Beattie’s attempt at an Australian action film that offers Hollywood level spills and thrills. Is he successful? The short answer is yes.

TWTWB offers great action sequences including a car chase involving a garbage truck and a pair gun toting buggies. There are some genuinely suspenseful moments as the teens find themselves stalked by helicopters from above and soldiers on the ground. The film lags when the characters are forced to reflect on their changing circumstances, changes in behaviour while warranted at times ring hollow; but given the compressed nature of a book adaption this is to be expected (I haven’t read any of the books so I am not sure what, if anything, has been lost in translation to the big screen).

Overall the young cast including Rachel Hurd-Wood, Deniz Akdeniz, Pheobe Tonkin, Chris Prang, Ashleigh Cummings and Lincoln Lewis, do their best, making the rag tag group feel like a group of friends; former Neighbours starlet Caitlin Stasey is the definite standout as Ellie the films emotional anchor and narrator. Some of the more emotionally dramatic moments are overwrought so it’s a shame that scene stealer Andrew Ryan’s stoner Chris doesn’t turn up until halfway through as he brings much needed levity to proceedings.

Tomorrow When the War Began is the third Australian film I’ve actually bothered to see at the movies this year; and probably more than I have seen in the last 3 years combined. I applaud Beattie and his crew for making a mainstream film that will appeal to a variety of audiences, and not just those that enjoy small independent films about life in the dreary Australia suburbs! Hopefully box office results are healthy and more films of this ilk can be made – perhaps even Tomorrow’s sequels can find their way to the big screen.

3 ½ of 5 Stars

PIRANHA 3D

Avatar took 3D to a whole new level, transporting us to an exotic foreign planet filled with amazing flora, fauna and cool blue people; but did it have a naked underwater ballet with hot chicks (buxom Kelly Brook and porn star Riley Steele) making out? I didn’t think so…

Spring break finds the usually sleepy Lake Victoria a hot bed of boozed up and horny teenagers, partying it up on the lake free of inhibitions – and modest clothing. Unfortunately a seismic disturbance opens up a cavern between Lake Victoria and previously cut off prehistoric underwater lake; a lake filled with hungry prehistoric piranha all too eager to chow down on partying teenagers. It’s up to a rag tag bunch, including town Sheriff Julie Forrester (Elisabeth Shue) and her son Jake (Steven R. McQueen) to save the day.

But who cares about the plot? Director Alexandre Aja clearly doesn’t, using it only as an excuse to link a series of gruesome deaths and boob shots. Aja is a master of the gruesome death scene, his piece de resistance being the prolonged feeding frenzy that occurs at a wet t-shit competition - the lake soon red with the blood.

I don’t know what Oscar winning Shue was thinking signing up for this but at least she seems to be having fun as the gung ho town sheriff. However it is Jerry O’Connell that has the most fun, hamming it up as Derrick Jones a sleazy pornographer – his comeuppance proves be one of the stupidest, grossest and funniest in the film, and truly shows the majesty of 3D. Jaws fans will get a kick out of Richard Dreyfuss’ cameo.

Piranha 3D won’t win any awards (maybe a Razzie) but it offers a bloodbath of gruesome deaths, a wet t-shirt competition and boobies; lots and lots of 3D boobies. And really, those expecting more should not bother…

3 of 5 Stars – No, really…

SALT

CIA agent Evelyn Salt (Angelina Jolie) finds her world turned upside down when she is accused of being a Russian double agent out to assassinate the Russian President. To make matters worse her husband appears to have been kidnapped – are the two incidences connected? So, with her own country turning against her Evelyn goes on the run to clear her name, save the Russian President and find the man she loves. But despite her protest of innocence can Salt really be trusted?

Director Phillip Noyce has crafted a well paced thriller full of twists and turns, expertly subverting expectations with each new revelation. Tension levels are constantly raised in a series of spectacular action sequences that prove that whoever she is Evelyn Salt is not someone to be messed with; the female Jason Bourne we have been waiting for.

Jolie handles the thrilling action sequences with aplomb while also imbuing Salt with a vulnerability to ensure that whatever her true identity we are firmly in her corner. She is supported by the talented Liev Schreiber as her CIA boss and Chiwetel Ejiofor as the man tasked with bringing her in at any cost.

While Salt is a tight thrill but I doubt the plots many twists and turns would hold up if put under close examination. Indeed its major failing is that the final revelation stretches the bounds of credibility just a bit too much. But despite that Salt remains a thoroughly enjoyable thriller which manages to build momentum right up till the final shot; which hints (hopefully) of a follow up adventure…

4 of 5 Stars

SCOTT PILGRIM VS THE WORLD

Scott Pilgrim (Michael Cera) has met the girl of his dreams in cool indie chick Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead). However the road to true love is paved with complications, like Scott’s current girlfriend Knives (Ellen Wong), oh and Ramona’s seven exes; all of them evil and all of them wanting to lay the smack down on Scott.

Based on a series of graphic novels by Bryan O’Malley Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (SPVTW) is a quirky romantic comedy cum battle royal which plays out like a big screen arcade game complete with power-ups, extra lives and defeated foes turning to coin.

For reasons that only make sense within the Scott Pilgrim Universe Scott must battle and defeat each of Ramona’s exes before they can be together. Each of the exes had their own special set of powers or abilities to test Scott – the oddest being an Ex who derives his super powers from his veganism. While the exes are fun 7 of them start to take their toll. And as SPVTW devolves into endless fight scene after fight scene it neglects to give us a deeper reason for why Scott is willing to risk his life for Ramona, other than he really likes her; hardly the stuff of epic love.

It’s a shame that SPVTW focuses on the very dull Scott and Ramona because it is filled with quirky well drawn characters, from Ramona’s distinctive exes (including upcoming Captain America Chris Evans and former Superman Brandon Routh) to Scott’s gay roommate Wallace Wells (Kieran Culkin). Indeed Culkin is a real scene stealer, his character providing garnering the biggest laughs. SPVTW does try hard to be funny, but like the love story, the laughs fall flat; although tell that to the guy elsewhere in the cinema who laughed. Every. Damn. Time. Someone. Opened. Their. Mouth!

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World is disappointing because while it is a spectacular visual treat (kudos to director Edgar Wright) the lack of a compelling story leaves it all sparkle and no substance.

2 of 5 Stars

THE EXPENDABLES

The Expendables promises to answer the burning question ‘What ever happened to all those 80’s action heroes?’ but ends up leaving us wanting to know ‘What the f**k happened to Sylvester Stallone’s face?’

The Expendables is writer/director Sly Stallone’s love letter to excessive action films of the late 80’s/early 90’s when men were men and the action was bloody, gory and over the top. The plot, or what passes for it, follows a rag tag bunch of mercenaries, led by Stallone’s Barney Ross, as they try and overthrow ruthless South American dictator General Garza (David Zayas) or rather the rogue CIA agent James Monroe (Eric Roberts) behind the dictator.

But let’s face it, you aren’t going to see The Expendables for the plot, it is for the cast and cast alone, and in that respect Sly has excelled. Stallone mashes actors from the old guard, Dolph Lundgren, Jet Li and Mickey Rourke with stars of today, Steve Austin, Terry Crewes, Randy Couture and Jason Statham; and a menacing but underused Eric Roberts as the villain of the piece.

Oh and lets not forget cameos from action legends Bruce Willis and Arnold ‘The Governator’ Schwarzenegger. That’s right the Holy Trinity of action heroes assembled together at last! Pity then that this undercooked tongue-in-cheek-less script fails to do the pop culture moment justice. A throwaway ‘president’ joke raises a laugh sure, but can’t we do better?

I’ll admit I wasn’t expecting much going into this movie, I hoped for a tongue-in-cheek True Lies style action romp. Instead, at 100 minutes, The Expendables is a bloated mess, things happen for no reason, characters motivations change on a whim and the action is at times so furious you end up having no idea what the hell is going on. It’s a real shame that Sly and co felt that aside from an ‘all star’ cast everything else like plot, story and character was…wait for it…expendable.

1.5 of 5 Stars